Post by heidivolturi on Sept 22, 2010 22:55:41 GMT -8
Tell me what you want to know and I will tell you. Tell me your heart's desire's and I will share mine. Tell me what you're looking for and I will find it for you... I never got what Apollo meant by that at first, I was 15 when he had landed that on me. I never knew it meant that he loved me more than anything in the world and he was willing to risk everything for me. I never got it until it was too late, as I lay in that street thinking that I would surely die. Ask me what love feels like and I can tell you. Love feels like pleasant sunshine on your skin, like the bright blue skies on a cloudless day. It feels like warmth inside your house on a rainy day, feels like the gentle breeze in your hair. It's like what you know of your world is rapidly spinning away and this one person had the power to whisk you away to another world. I don't remember much of human life, only Apollo, but he felt like love. Apollo felt like safety, like warmth, he felt like and older brother. He was and he was good at being an older brother. Now I wonder if he ever found someone to love, someone that cared about him the same way he cared about them. Some days I sit in the garden, wishing I could cry and just let everything go. There is too much sadness in this castle, too much ugliness even though the castle is filled with beautiful creatures. We do a lot of horrible things, sometimes I wonder if we're any better off than the humans. I feel like there's a lot we take for granted, the humans do too, but eventually they realize they can't go on living that way. Us vampires are lost, some too broken to try. Some may see us as angels, but I highly doubt that angels should be so blood thirsty, so broken, so lonely, so sad. I wonder what has happened, looking back, as a human I would have thought that major life changes shouldn't have such an effect on your beliefs, but now I know I was wrong. I just want to feel light with happiness again. Is that too much to ask for?