entry # 1 : Burned At The Stake [Alec]

[janevolturi]

Till everything burns
While everyone screams

The cell door was loud and obvious. It woke me every morning as it opened and closed, people coming in and out to speak to me. To feed me. Pastors constantly tried to convince me to find the lord and to repent. Most of the time I sent them away, cursing and commenting on how I was such a devil's child. How I deserved what was coming to me. No one ever really mentioned what was happening around me, but I knew. They all thought I was a witch. Every one of them.

Late at night, men would come into my cell and attempt to beat me. I always seemed to make them run away screaming. They acted like I vouched their eyes out, or set them on fire. I've noticed the feelings I get when this happens. Pleasure. Accomplishment. Enjoyment. Excitement. However, they've figured out how to finally get to me. They took Alec away and locked him up far down the hall. When I thought no one was listening, I'd call for him. He'd answer if he thought it was clear, and we'd talk for however long we could. He knew what was coming as well. He knew we were at the end.

The days dragged on and on, and slowly I could feel myself waste away. My other half, my Alec, my dear brother, was far down the hall. Away from me. I sometimes wondered how he felt, locked up without me. Did he cry at night while we were being watched? Did his throat close up as mine did all day long? Did he suffer in silence? I think he did. I could sort of feel him, wasting away as I was. I would say it was most likely our twin bond.

And finally, the day came. I could feel the shift of time in the air. My stomach fluttered madly, however I couldn't tell why. Alec called often that day from down the hall despite the many harsh commands to shut up. Slowly I became aware of what was happening, and I called to Alec as well. Eventually the guards gave up and let us yell to each other until our voices worked no more. I could feel his panic, for it mirrored mine. All would be over soon, I had tried to consol myself to no avail. Once again pastors stormed into both our cells and attempted to save us.

After a while they started to direct their attention to me, obviously giving up on Alec. They pleaded for me to save myself, and that my brother was beyond help. Everytime someone said that, I got more angry. I would never leave Alec alone to be burned, and I wanted no more redemption. All I had ever wanted was to be at his side when all of this finally ended. No one seemed to understand our connection, they all thought I was childish and ignorant.

Once the flood of people stopped coming Alec and I talked for a little while longer. Then his voice disappeared, replaced by the opening of a cell door far away and the sound of futile struggling. Alec called out to be once more before being silenced and dragged away to some unknown place. I was next, and I knew it. My heart raced fast, however I was more concerned for Alec than for myself. Where had they taken him? Was he alright? How much longer would they seperate us like this?

After the longest twenty minutes of my life, the guards came back for me. I struggled and fought, but it seemed only one man of the many would ever get suffer and run. That day I wanted them all to suffer how they were making us suffer. I wanted them to burn too. I wanted them to feel our pain. With jerking motions they ushered me outside to a bright, star filled night. The moon was full and the night air was cool. However, these were not the things I was focusing on. Desperately I searched for Alec, only to feel my heart sink when I found him on the large wooden pole that stuck out from a stage of dirt.

Around me I listened as the whole village cheered. Everyone had come to watch us burn. Were people that horrible? It had looked that way. After a very long walk through the crowd of jeering haters, the guards hoisted me up to the mound and tied me securely to the pole as well. As soon as I could hear Alec, he was calling my name. He tried to calm me, telling me everything was going to be fine. I felt numb from how scared I was for us. Silently, I listened to him try and consol us both, holding his hand tightly in mine.

I hung my head in defeat, something I wasn't accustomed to and something I didn't like. It crept through me like poison, turning my look of humanity to shreds. I was almost glad I was leaving. Alec and I didn't belong here, not with these beasts that called themselves civilized beings. The only thing I dreaded now was the pain that was to come. In a rushed fashion, the townspeople surrounded our pole with flamable objects; hay, sticks, logs. Anything that would burn, and burn quickly.

Once they were done, the guard with the torch asked us if we had any last words. My head was down, and I remained quiet. Alec mirrored my silence, and after a few seconds they lit the pyre. I watched as the flames engulfed the wood at our feet. I could feel the heat, but it was a few minutes before I felt the flames. It was horrible, a burning sensation like no other. And we couldn't move to make it stop; only stay and watch as it became more painful. The people around watching this madness cheered, erupting in aplasue and whistles.

I bit back my pain as long as I could, but eventually it became too much. I tossed my head back and screamed as loud as I could, hoping with it I could shake some of the pain. Not long after did Alec follow my outburst. The whole time I held his hand, squeezing it when the pain started and pretty much killing it when it became unbearable. I believe I was the first to black out from the smoke and the pain, for Alec's pressure on my hand remained even when I left mine for the darkness. I felt his panic, however I headed for the black abyss of no feeling. It was bliss there, away from any of my senses that screamed to me that I was dying.

Only Alec's presence would have made it better.

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Burning in their lies
Burning my dreams