entry #1 everything i could want

[Leah Clearwater]

October 17th, 2004

Dear Diary,

Life is perfect. I can’t describe it any other way. Everything is falling into place.

I can’t believe freshmen year could be going this well! I’ll admit I was a little nervous at first. Don’t know why. I mean I grew up with all these kids. It’s not like I was transferring to a different school and starting over where I didn’t know anybody. But I was a little nervous and I was excited. Being a freshmen is like a starting a new chapter in life. A new beginning. And I love it.

I’m so happy right now, I might explode.

Rachel and I are quite the pair. We go everywhere together. She is like the sister I wish I had. Don’t get me wrong. I love Seth with all my heart but having a brother isn’t the same as having a sister. It funny how we run around the school and the Res like we own the place. Just a couple of teenagers. Rachel comes up with some crazy ideas sometimes, but we have the best time. Like yesterday when she convinced me to go cliff diving!! I thought she was kidding when she suggested it. Then I thought she was nuts when I realized she was serious. But that’s my best friend for ya. Crazy, fun-loving. My life would be so boring without her.

But we defiantly went cliff diving. I wasn’t going to at first. I told her I’d watch her jump off into that freezing water --- to be honest I didn’t think she’d actually jump and some of the boys didn’t either. Yeah that’s right a group of boys heard of Rachel’s plan and followed us out to the cliffs after school. Said they wanted to watch us back out. So they weren’t surprised when I said I wouldn’t. I hoped that if I backed out Rachel would too. Maybe I should have known better. She called me a chicken and clucked a few times. I’d tell you she’s a bad influence, but that would be lying. All my confidence has come from that crazy girl. And I only know how to have a good time because of her. So I told her I wasn’t chicken and she made me pinky promise to jump with her.

So there we stood at the cliffs edge – not the tallest cliff mind you, it was one of the shorter ones—with the boys yelling to just jump already. I looked at Rachel, nervous as all get out. My body was shaking all over and if we didn’t jump soon I thought I might pass out. Girls don’t really go cliff diving. According to Jake it’s a ‘boy’s sport’. Well don’t ever tell Rachel she can’t do something. Or you’ll end up on a cliff on the verge of passing out like I did. And when I looked at Rachel, she grinned! Almost laughed! This was all a good time to her. Then she grabbed my hand and yelled jump. I didn’t even think. I jumped. Air whipped passed us. But for the few second we were in the air, it felt like eternity, it felt like we could fly.

That water was ICE COLD though. We hit the water and all the air left me. The cold was crushing to the point it was almost painful. But we never let go of each other. And when we got to the water surface we broke out laughing which is difficult without any breath. We got to shore wet and freezing with chatter teeth and there was another group of boys. What is it with boys and freezing water? But in that group of boys was Sam. The Sam Uley. That feeling like I was gonna pass out over came me again. But I didn’t get a chance to – thankfully -- before Rachel nudged me toward Sam and he wrapped his extra towel around me.

And I’m pretty sure that’s how I got Sam Uley’s attention. He looked different that day on the beach. He looked older. But what did that matter? Teenage boys grow overnight don’t they? We spent the rest of that day together. The whole group of us. Sam drove me and Rachel to my house to change and then everyone went to Sam’s. There was a bonfire and pizza and laughing. And Sam. My heart pounded all night. The butterflies in my stomach wouldn’t stop. He gave me his sweatshirt when I got cold and got me something to drink without me asking. The night was perfect. He is perfect. He took me home after everyone left his house. He walked me to my front door and we stood there in the glow of the porch light. I thought I was going to pass out again. Sam asked me to be his date to the bonfire at the beach tonight and kissed me goodnight.

I haven’t stopped smiling. I’ve tried. I think it creeps Seth out a little. But I just can’t stop.

Sam and I talked on the phone for a long time today. I’m anxious for tonight. I’m stilling smiling like a fool…

I sound like a silly little girl with a silly little crush… but what can I say, this is everything I’ve ever want.

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---- Leah[/font]